A question for the ladies

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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by blue »

Charlie Mike wrote: August 5th, 2022, 9:43 am That's the feels I'm trying to evoke!


I'm not there yet. I'm not hating you for this story. Right now, it is too cliche.

Make me hate you.
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Charlie Mike
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Re: A question for the ladies

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Boadicea wrote: August 5th, 2022, 9:45 am I hate those types of situations. They are messy. I like a clear protagonist and resolution.
You're supposed to hate because IT IS messy. That's where the dramatic tension is found.

One of my proudest moments was when a friend came to me and told me his wife and daughter had read my book and then proceeded to tell me, "You had my wife and daughter in tears at the end."

But all of this is merely a backdrop for the main story.

Imagine the next morning - after everything has blown up in the worst way possible - the husband and other woman have to sit down with their mutual client in front of a military court. They're both committed professionals, but at this moment, the tension hangs over them. It's so palpable people around them, even their client, sense something is up.

The client is a young female lieutenant of the medical corps decorated for Valor for charging out of protective cover during an intense mortar barrage to retrieve and treat a wounded Soldier. As an officer, she's held in high regard by her troops. Unfortunately for her, her life back in the states becomes a nightmare. She's been personally and professionally humiliated, her own marriage is threatened by the stress, her career is most likely ruined, the court has the power to imprison her, and the unit she serves with is being torn apart by this episode with fights between Soldiers even breaking out.

Chances are, you're probably feeling something just from this dry exposition. Imagine a more prosaic presentation where the events emerge through show-don't-tell.

We should sit down over beers some day and I can regale you with stories of the military justice system.

Bring a slicker. It'll be messy.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Janet »

Charlie Mike wrote: August 3rd, 2022, 5:38 pm Imagine you are reading a novel.

The lead character, a dude, is in a loveless marriage. The couple gets along well enough, but they haven't touched each other in years and they are just plodding along day by day.

Then, one day, by accident, the wife finds out her husband is in love with another woman. The other woman strong, capable professional who is also very attractive. The husband and the other woman often have dinner together and work requires them to be together for extended periods of time. They enjoy a lot of laughs and common interests. They almost seem like the perfect couple who ought to be together.

Furious, the wife hires a PI, and then comes the real shocker: they aren't sleeping together. They don't kiss. They don't even hold hands. In fact, it's not even certain the other woman is aware of the husband's feelings. It seems he has kept his feelings to himself out of fear that a relationship could hurt - professionally or otherwise - the other woman and he doesn't want to be an adulterer.

As a wife, how would you react?

If it's a cycle of emotions or whatever, describe the whole thing.

I have to imagine the thought of infidelity is crushing enough, but the thought of someone being a better fit for their spouse would just leave the spouse feeling hollowed out. Even a sexual relationship might seem better because at least then it could be blamed on appetite or some such.

Can you hate someone who has naturally occurring feelings but remains physically faithful?
I'm a pragmatist, if I were in a loveless, non-physical relationship with my husband, I'd expect him to feel attraction to someone else. If I didn't think counseling would help us, I'd wish him well and grant him a divorce.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by oflguy »

CM, you are about to make three women mad at you

:shock:
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Charlie Mike »

oflguy wrote: August 5th, 2022, 2:33 pm CM, you are about to make three women mad at you

:shock:
A career low, actually.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Charlie Mike »

blue wrote: August 5th, 2022, 9:54 am I'm not there yet. I'm not hating you for this story. Right now, it is too cliche.

Make me hate you.
Is not-sleeping with another woman actually cliche?

I don't read a lot dramatic stories. I'm mostly a history guy.

But I do have to observe: y'all seem pretty intent on blaming dude for the failed marriage. :lol:
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by blue »

Charlie Mike wrote: August 5th, 2022, 3:07 pm Is not-sleeping with another woman actually cliche?

I don't read a lot dramatic stories. I'm mostly a history guy.

But I do have to observe: y'all seem pretty intent on blaming dude for the failed marriage. :lol:
He's not sleeping with either of them, correct? Is he secretly gay?

:mrgreen:

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

To me, it seems like the same exact relationship between the both of them. If he is anti-sexual, then I imagine readers would be more interested in his other interests. Does he have any other addictions? Can he flip houses? :lol:

If he wants to be sexual, but is just hoping that his first relationship will somehow morph back into that, yet he's seeing another chick? Not happening. Divorce. End of story. Screw the new woman for goodness sakes.

I find the goodie goodie new woman annoying with her cute smile and her oh so innocent charm.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Boadicea »

Charlie Mike wrote: August 5th, 2022, 3:07 pm Is not-sleeping with another woman actually cliche?

I don't read a lot dramatic stories. I'm mostly a history guy.

But I do have to observe: y'all seem pretty intent on blaming dude for the failed marriage. :lol:
I don't blame him for the failed marriage, but he is one of two people in it. What has he done to preserve his marriage? As soon as he started having feelings for the other woman, he should have put a stop to it. That can be done. If he was miserable in his marriage, it was up to him to end it. By continuing his feelings for the other woman while not being honest with his wife, he is at fault there. (I have lots of opinions on cheaters, my mother was grade A when it came to cheating on husbands. She is married to number 5. He was the last one.)

As to his wife, the fact that she hired a PI signals to me that she is invested in her marriage. The way you have phrased it to us makes her the sympathetic character. I don't have sympathy for the man at all. I also feel sympathy for the other woman. She is involved through no fault of her own.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Boadicea »

blue wrote: August 5th, 2022, 3:25 pm He's not sleeping with either of them, correct? Is he secretly gay?

:mrgreen:

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

To me, it seems like the same exact relationship between the both of them. If he is anti-sexual, then I imagine readers would be more interested in his other interests. Does he have any other addictions? Can he flip houses? :lol:

If he wants to be sexual, but is just hoping that his first relationship will somehow morph back into that, yet he's seeing another chick? Not happening. Divorce. End of story. Screw the new woman for goodness sakes.

I find the goodie goodie new woman annoying with her cute smile and her oh so innocent charm.
That's a great plot twist. I sympathize with the new woman because she can't help who she is, but I doubt I would be friends with her. She sounds too perfect.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Fine Kettle Of Fish »

I've been following this thread with some interest. I know you only asked for opinions from the ladies, so instead of commenting, I'll ask - may I comment on this?
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Re: A question for the ladies

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Fine Kettle Of Fish wrote: August 5th, 2022, 5:33 pm I've been following this thread with some interest. I know you only asked for opinions from the ladies, so instead of commenting, I'll ask - may I comment on this?
I would be interested in hearing a man's perspective on it.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Charlie Mike »

Fine Kettle Of Fish wrote: August 5th, 2022, 5:33 pm I've been following this thread with some interest. I know you only asked for opinions from the ladies, so instead of commenting, I'll ask - may I comment on this?
Well, I definitely wanted to get the female perspective, but I'm not the kind of person that would go, "NO! YOU CAN'T!"

I appreciate the courtesy you have extended, but please feel free to offer your thoughts.
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Charlie Mike »

Boadicea wrote: August 5th, 2022, 5:49 pm I would be interested in hearing a man's perspective on it.
Go for the side piece.

:mrgreen:
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Boadicea »

Charlie Mike wrote: August 5th, 2022, 6:01 pm Go for the side piece.

:mrgreen:
yup....100%
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Re: A question for the ladies

Unread post by Fine Kettle Of Fish »

Well, most of what I was going to ask/say was regarding the first post, and most of those things were cleared up in subsequent posts, so I don't have as much to contribute or question as I initially thought.

Realizing you're not going to spill all the beans, I can't help but wonder what's holding the couple together in the first place. Finances? The kids? Force of habit?

Did she hire a PI because she thinks that's part of a plan to save the marriage? Not seeing it. Looking for a payday? That would be more likely, but would make for a way less original story line than what you're suggesting, and I don't get the impression that's what you want. As you've said - it's only a tragedy if lives are wrecked through no direct fault.

But two pages of posts down the line, the thing that really fascinates me is the reaction of the two women in the thread doing mot of the replying. "Disloyalty", "cheating" "he should have put a stop to it"... Huh? The last thing I'm seeing here is cheating or disloyalty. He's kept his dick in his pants and his feelings to himself. It's eating him alive. How is this disloyalty?

I'm gonna stop now before I'm just talking to hear myself talk - as I said most of what I was going to say has since been addressed.
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